Hey Lisa, Sorry to be an Asshole
- lahey6414
- May 11, 2024
- 2 min read
Updated: May 30, 2024

I received a rejection letter today from BULL magazine. The man (Ben) who wrote it was so angry that he littered it with obscenities and sarcasm, just in case I didn't understand how much he hated my work. For that, I was grateful. It did indeed clarify any issues I might not have understood.
I liked the letter so much I framed it and placed it on my Literary Trophy Wall (a wall where I frame my work from magazines).
It's right beside the first print magazine that ever published me...34th Parallel Magazine is on the left; BULL is on the right. It symbolizes the pride that goeth before a fall.
Here is the letter:
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Sat, May 11, 2024 7:34 AM
From: BULL
To: lisa lahey
Subject: "The Reaper"
Hey lisa,
Thanks for sending this our way. It starts off really strong with the blunt, straightforward narration of it and the banter between the men.
In the end, unfortunately, I just felt like the thread with rape of the black (sp*) girl quite coalesced with the story of these guys.
Of course, there's also a good chance that I've just got my head up my ass again and talking out my asshole, as is often the case. As you are receiving this shitty shitty piece of shit email, please focus on what a fuckup/loser/hack writer I am in real life, so you can quickly dismiss this shitty shitty rejection and find another less dickish editor who will fully appreciate your work.
That said, if you would, please wait a few months before you submit again to give me time to pull my head out of my ass and dig the shit out of my eyes.
Sorry to be an asshole.
ben/BULL
Best. Rejection. Ever.